What Do People Really, Really Want?

A Leadership Perspective on Unattainable Desires

A recent survey of 700 people asked a simple yet profound question: What do you want most in life? The responses revealed a common longing for meaning, satisfaction, and joy. Here are the top 10 desires - ranked in order of importance - according to those surveyed:

Happiness
Money
Freedom
Peace
Joy
Balance
Fulfillment
Confidence
Stability
Passion

Here's the rub....

At first glance, this list seems both inspiring and achievable. Yet, there’s a troubling undercurrent—many of those surveyed gave the impression that their desires felt unattainable. They saw happiness, peace, and fulfillment as distant dreams rather than tangible goals. As leaders, this sobering insight challenges us to ask: How can we help others believe that these aspirations are within reach?

1. Happiness: The Universal Pursuit

Happiness sits at the top because it’s the ultimate human desire. Yet, many struggle to define or achieve it. As leaders, we can’t create happiness for others, but we can cultivate environments where happiness is more likely to thrive—spaces built on respect, inclusion, and encouragement. When people feel connected, seen, and valued, happiness becomes achievable.

2. Money: More Than a Paycheck

Money represents security, opportunity, and independence, yet many people have a poor relationship with their money. They often think they’ll never have “enough.” Leaders can’t control everyone’s financial situation, but we can ensure fair compensation and create opportunities for growth. When employees see a path to financial stability and success, their sense of control and hope increases.

3. Freedom: The Gift of Trust

Freedom reflects a longing for autonomy and choice. Sadly, many people think they are trapped in their routines or circumstances. In the workplace, this translates to a need for trust. Empower your team to take ownership of their work, make decisions, and innovate. When people know they are trusted, freedom doesn’t isn't so far away.

4. Peace: Reducing the Chaos

Peace often feels elusive in today’s chaotic world. For many, the demands of work, family, and life feel overwhelming. Leaders can play a pivotal role in fostering peace by creating stable, supportive environments and addressing conflicts early. Promoting work-life balance and mental well-being helps turn the idea of peace into a daily reality.

5. Joy: Finding Meaning

Joy goes deeper than fleeting happiness—it’s about purpose and fulfillment. For those who feel joy is out of reach, leaders can help by connecting their roles to a greater purpose. When people see the impact of their work, joy can become a byproduct. NOTE: this does not mean you should tie your purpose to your work/career. Purpose can be lived out in many ways and seasons of your life.

6. Balance: Aligning Priorities

Balance is one of the most tangible yet elusive desires on this list. Identifying your focus (what's most important to you) and living intentionally into your focus will be a life changer. Leaders can set the example by modeling healthy boundaries and encouraging flexibility. Supporting employees as whole individuals—beyond their roles—can help them regain a sense of balance.

Turning “Unattainable” into Possible

The common thread in these responses is a sense of hopelessness, a belief that their dreams are out of reach. Leaders have the unique opportunity—and responsibility—to change that narrative. Here’s how:

Model: Inspire Hope by speaking to the possibilities, not just the challenges. Remind your team that growth and improvement are always within reach. Lead by Example. Also, Recognize and celebrate progress, no matter how small. When people see tangible steps forward, the unattainable feels closer.
Focus: Be intentional in living into your values/mission as a business (FYI if you think that means making money or placing 100% of your focus on your customer satisfaction, we should probably talk). Also being aware that your team members/employees have things outside of work that is a main focus to them - just like you do.
Equip: Equip your people with the skills, resources, and support needed to achieve their goals. Give them the tools that will make them better leaders personally and they will become better leaders professionally as well.

A Call to Action

The desires expressed in this survey are universal, but the sense of impossibility is a barrier we must work to overcome. Life is too short, and our callings are too great to let anyone believe they’re stuck or incapable of achieving their dreams.

As leaders, let’s inspire, empower, and create environments where happiness, freedom, peace, and fulfillment are not just ideals but attainable realities. The journey starts with us. Will you take the first step?

Call me if you are looking for ideas. I'd love to assist you!

Kris