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Writer's pictureLeadership Harbor Coach

Are You Rich?

Are You Rich?



How do you hear this question? Do you think - am I asking “Do you have lots of money?” That’s one perspective, but that’s not what I am truly asking. There are other ways of feeling rich.


What if I asked the question in a different manner - How are you rich? Do you still think of this in a financial sense? If so, then, you may realize that you do have a money focus. If you are able to define rich with relationships, or the recognition that you have everything you could ever need, then you are rich in another interpretation. I say maybe because I do not know the other thoughts or words being spoken that are uttered with frustration or disdain with me asking such a question or the air of abundance that may appear in your voice. Only you know in what manner your words, thoughts and feelings are syncing to produce your message to the universe.


I am a recovering perfectionist.


I liken this to those that have their own struggles with inner negative forces and addictions. I want to clarify that I would rather have this inner struggle than some of the other additions and negative mindsets in the world.


As a person that often focused on perfection - it was difficult to feel “rich” because I found myself lacking. When I learned that I was “perfect” the way I was, I reached my first point of feeling “rich.”


The next step was learning when to strive for excellence? I’ll admit, this is on the road to perfection. I decide in what areas of life it was important to me to achieve more than being average? Being average by itself is not bad, but then again, it is not good either. And it is certainly not great. Average means that ½ of others are better than you and ½ of everyone else is not as good as you. Another word for average is mediocre. That word has even less positive implications for me.


Life is not about comparisons

and yet it is. We compare all the time. Sometimes in a positive sense, and sometimes not.


Think about what kinds of things you like to do, see or experience: Go out to eat? Go out to a movie? What about your house? What type of vacation? Do you desire the average restaurant - average food? Do you want to have a mediocre vacation? An average place to live? Most likely we do not want average; however we may “settle” for average.


Why do we settle for mediocre?

Because we tell ourselves that we don’t deserve more, or at least we aren’t willing to put in the effort for more.


I’ll be honest, money is important to me. It is a form of my own security. Money also gives me freedom - it is one of my values. This freedom has allowed me to “retire” from my corporate job and live into something that has been part of me for my whole life - personal growth. Freedom and growth are two of my values. Living into my values allows me to feel very “rich.”


What are your personal values? One time, I was working with a corporate group having them define their personal values. This can be very difficult because there are a lot of important values to people or is it that there are a lot of values that are important to people. Nevertheless, when this individual worked to narrow their personal values down, this person got down to 10 values, then said, “That’s it. I cannot narrow it down any more.” Au contraire - yes you can. Values help us make our decisions. In fact, the narrower one can take their values, the more easily decisions can be made. Besides, if the hard decisions were never difficult, people would not make so many incorrect decisions.


Living into our values is a choice.


It is a challenge to our spirit only when we ignore our values, and live our fears. I know some who want to be in control of their situations (for some it's their jobs, for others it’s their personal lives, and for some it's both); and yet they are living outside of their “circle of control.” They are trying to control something for which they have no control; and they “see” the other person(s) failing to live into “their part of the (unwritten) agreement. Next, they assume the worst; and struggle to want to face the other person. Fear is in control. Obviously, we are not feeling rich at this point.


Are you rich? Do you want more of something? What is the “what” that you want more of, that will enable you to feel rich? How can I add value to your dreams and desires of the feeling of “rich?”



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